I have worked so hard in my life
that I don’t have time to prove anything to anyone at this point. How much do I
really want to show you that I am ok? And if I have to try and convince someone that
I am ok then is it even worth it? If It’s not already obvious that I am doing well,
then what’s the point of standing up and screaming that I am?
My son said something to me the
other day. And I use it as my reminder that I am a successful parent. He said
that he feels like we are rich. We are so not rich, but the fact that my child
is satisfied is enough of a confirmation for me.
I’ve been a single parent for the
majority of my child’s life. It amazes me when people say “I don’t know how you
do it.” I don’t see any other option, parenting is parenting and the child’s
development lies in my hands because I am not the parent that left. What’s more
is how people allow single parenting as an excuse for failure. I always felt failure is not an option. If one at
least tries and is not successful, that doesn't mean one has failed, it just means try a different way.
I graciously accept all compliments
of my life and my child. I work nearly full time and I am putting
myself through school. Believe me, it’s
not easy. And those in my life who tell me that I can do it; that I will be
successful because I won’t give up when it gets tough, they mean the world to
me. They are in the small group that doesn’t immediately bestow failure on me. I
feel life is difficult at times not matter what and regardless of how many
parents are in the home, it’s how one deals with the situations that really
define you, not the lack of support.
If I am completely honest with
myself, I actually enjoy “single” parenting. My son is growing into an
incredible person and being able to see him everyday is truly a blessing. I
have grown so much because I opened my heart. This little boy came into this
world innocent and deserves nothing less than the comfort and support of a
mother’s heart. I feel it’s my job to
give him all the tools he needs to be a successful person. And it’s his
decision as he grows to utilize those tools.
While it’s sad that my family is in
shambles (because really we all wish we could be the Huxtables) I have another
family to put my time and energy into, the little boy that calls me “Mom.” The
most important role I will play on this earth is that job title.
